Selling The Past

My grandmother, Rebecca Goldie Granger, passed away in May.  I loved her very much and it has been extremely difficult. 
My dad and my uncle have been working non stop on preparing her house for sale since late May.  It has been a big project, as my grandma had her house for over 50 years.  Within that time, there was quite the accumulation of random things.  I grew up in that house, as did other family members.  As I walk through the now empty house, I remember my childhood.  I remember sitting in the tub taking a bath while my grandma waited patiently.  I remember the big wall heater, laying in front of it's warmth and comfort.  All of it is such a big part of me- all of the memories, the past, and my childhood is deeply rooted within the foundation.  Something I will never forget for as long as I live.

I thought it would be easy to have an estate sale.  I thought it would be easy to let go of seemingly unimportant things.  It's just "stuff".  I was thinking about how I wanted to get the new iPhone with the proceeds.  I was thinking it wouldn't be too bad to have a few extra dollars.  I now know that is easier said than done, however. 

I went to grandma's house tonight and it was very difficult to see her things piled up and in boxes.  Most of my grandma's possessions were forgotten about, long ago, even by her.  As I began sifting through the tangible remnants of her life, I found myself becoming weirdly attached to things that belonged to her and my grandpa.  I want to hold on to everything simply because it was hers- because she once held it.  Obviously, I can't keep everything, it's not feasible nor realistic.  Howerver, it's so hard to loosen my grip on my grandparent's past and their life in that house.

Anyways, I should get to bed now.  This is all a bit overwhelming and I feel almost frantic and anxious.  I have a big day ahead of me.  So help me, people better not act like assholes...