Things I Hate (Relating to Food)

1.  Mushrooms.  One word.  Disgusting.  I especially hate the way they smell.   Have you ever seen those shit dens where certain mushrooms are grown?  In shit, in the dark.  I like my food relatively shit free, thank you.

2.  Weird meats.  Self explanatory.  Veal, venison, duck, rabbit, lamb.  No Christmas goose for me. Organ meat...absolutely no liver, kidneys, etc. Disgusting. 

Omg.  PP, do you have Trader Joe's in Mass?  They have the best vegetarian corndogs...soooo good!!

3.  Cheap ground meat.  You know, when there's grissle in it. Ew.  And this includes sausage and  hotdogs.  I gave up on that shit unless they are a. kosher or b. vegetarian (which I prefer the most).

4.  Meat and or eggs that are loaded with antibiotics, and the animals which are treated like shit and slaughtered so we can eat them.  I only buy cage free, organic eggs (eggs kinda creep me out anyways).  If I buy chicken, it's antibiotic-free, naturally fed, free range.  That shit is expensive, so I'll buy it twice a year. 

When I cook, it's almost entirely vegetarian.  Seriously, maybe a few times a year I'll make chicken.  I just don't think you need meat to a. be healthy or b. have a good meal.  Handling raw meat makes me gag anyways.  Sickening.  If I cook it , I regret it because it's soooo gross looking.  Ew!

Hey, I'm not perfect, I'll go out and eat, and of course I don't require everything to be organic, etc.  Too difficult and expensive.  A secret about me... I love McDonald's cheeseburgers--- delicious.  That is my total guilty pleasure.  Yum.  Why are they so good?  And why am I a hypocrite?

5.  Meat that has fat, veins, tendons, bones, grissle, etc.

6.  Deli meat.  Have you ever bought turkey from the deli?  If the light hits it just right, there's a rainbow embedded on the surface of the meat.  Sooooooo gross.  I was making sangwiches for my sister and I when I discovered it.  SICK!  My sister told me to shut up--- I was obsessed.  Why is there a rainbow on the meat?????  Why???  Rainbow.  On.  The.  Meat??????  On the meat?!! Ewwwww. Someone told me it was the nitrates they use to preserve it.  Even the expensive one is laced with rainbow.  Cheese sangwiches for me.  I can't do it.

7.  Food remnants.  When someone doesn't clean the jelly off the knife and puts it in the peanut butter-- then there's jelly in the peanut butter.  That shit is disgusting.  It's the same with butter.  I will fucking cut you if I find a. crumbs in my butter or b. jelly in my butter.  Soooo nasty.  And I've found butter and other random stuff (LIKE POTATO PARTICLES) in my sour cream.  It makes me mad thinking about it.

8.  Mayonnaise.  I absolutely hate when I get a sangwich and there's mayo dripping out of it.  Disgusting.  I only like it if it's nicely placed--- barely any.  I can even deal without it.  I don't know why it makes me gag.  I can, however, eat it in like potato salad.  But it's mixed in with something, so it's different.

9.  Expiration dates.  If something is expired I throw it away.  I don't know why, but I'm weird about it.  I absolutely hate it when someone throws away the thing to keep the bag to the bread closed.  You know why?  Because it has the fucking expiration date on it.  I think my sister threw it away the other day...and I knew the bread was about to expire so I was irritated.

10.  Green beans in a can with almonds.  Need I say more?  I know god damn well that PP wouldn't go for that.